Before I even start this post I want y’all to know that I am in no way an uptight Mother. Well that’s a lie. I used to be an uptight Mother. Following my oldest Son around until he was nearly 3 years old. Wiping his face, making sure his socks were on right, basically I was his shadow. Present day Shirri is more calm, cool, and collective. Westin, my youngest, could possibly eat dirt tomorrow and I wouldn’t even bat an eye.. It’ll come out on its own right? Anyways, here are the top 5 things I’ve learned after being a Mother for 4 and a half years.
Number 1: You cannot force your children to do anything that they just don’t want to do. Seems simple right?? This should be a no brainier. Wyatt, my 4 year old, is so active. He loves playing soccer and baseball with his Daddy. So a few days ago I asked him if he wanted to play on a team with kids his age. His response was very simple.. “No, I’m scared.”. Okay, now as a Mom I’m thinking that this is a phase, when he starts school he’ll have friends and he’ll want to play sports with them. So I’ve let that subject go, for now. If I keep nagging him about it, I know I’ll push him away even further. I don’t need my son to play sports. I see different talents in him, and I want him to find his calling on his own.
Number 2: Bedtime should be structured from day 1. Seriously, this is a big one for me. It makes everyone a little happier in the mornings. Plus, it gives parents a couple hours at the end of the day to do adult things.. Get your head out of the gutter y’all, I’m clearly talking about real quality time, being able to genuinely listen to each other without having to tune out the Caillou theme song in the background. Make a schedule and stick to it. When you’re tired at the end of the day it’s nice to have a countdown to bedtime, rather than having to hog tie your child and pray to God that they stay in bed. I’ve had Westin on a pretty tight sleep schedule since his first day home from the hospital. As a result, he goes to sleep at 6:30 PM on the dot EVERY night, he gets his 13 hours of sleep and wakes up at the same time every morning bright eyed and bushy tailed. Yes, I said 13 hours, he’s like his Momma, it’s a gift really.
Number 3: If you have siblings let the oldest help you. I read somewhere that you never really know how much of a control freak you are until you allow a toddler to help you cook. That is without a doubt, 100% true. I almost lost my marbles the first few times I let Wyatt help me with his brother, and around the house. A couple months passed and now I honestly don’t know what I’d do without his help. Not only does it make my life easier but it makes him feel proud of himself. He’ll help me make his lunch, load the washer and dryer, and he’ll entertain his brother when I need to clean up. The list could go on forever. Give your kids some sort of accomplishment and I believe they’ll grow to chase that feeling.
Number 4: Manners, y’all!! Raise your children to respect their surroundings. I see so many kids these days with complete disregard for others feelings, and a lot of back talking. “Yes Ma’am”, “Yes Sir”, “No, Thank You”, “Yes, Please”, “Excuse Me”, “I’m Sorry”, and “May I” should not just be words your child uses when they want something. Growing up in the South I caught on real quick on how you’re supposed to act. Its no joke down here.. Be respectful, or be ignored. I’m proud to say that my 4 year old has used these words since he was 2. To me manners are the foundation to a self respecting individual.
Number 5: Don’t stress about the little things.. Those little things being your children. Parenting is hard enough. There is no need to micromanage the way you’re doing it. As long as children have structure and affection they’ll be just fine. It’s super easy for me to get lost into the rush of things and second guess my ways. The simple fact that you’re worried about something is just the reassurance you need that you’re excellent at doing what you do.
That’s it for now!! I hope you had a wonderful first day of Fall. Thanks for following me through this journey called Motherhood. Until next time! -Rae